On Habits and the Power of Repetition
Are you a creature of habit? We all are! Even if it seems difficult to start new ones.
I am a total creature of habit. I get up at the same time, give or take a few minutes, every day. I brush my teeth and put lotion on my face. While the kettle is boiling, I eat a piece of fruit, then make my first cup of tea. Every day. And each morning I take my tea to my desk and open my word doc. to whatever page I ended on the day before. I dive into my manuscript and write, revise and edit up to three chapters. Rinse, wring, and repeat.
Every day.
This wasn’t always my habit. When Jack, our Bichon mix, was alive, his routine was part of my habit. I let him outside, I fed him breakfast and a bowl of water. Before that, when my kids were younger, my children’s routines were part of my daily habit. Get them dressed, fed and off to school. It’s easy to take care of the things—to make a habit—of the things you care most about.
But once you get rooted in a routine, it becomes more difficult to add something new. Right?
The question of time will come into play. I don’t have enough time. How can I make time? What time can I fit that in? But the truth is, it’s easier to make time if the thing is important to you.
This week I met with a group of writer friends for dinner. The conversation moved around, as it usually does, to all the shoulds we writers torture ourselves with. You know what I mean. I should be writing a chapter a day. I should be promoting my older books. I should write a weekly blog. One author asked me how I do it. She seemed awed that I show up with this little post each week. “And there she is again,” she said. “How on earth do you fit it in?”
Five years ago when Best Kept Secrets debuted—Oh boy, has it only been 5?—I hated the idea of a newsletter. After all, I already received several dozen newsletters that I hate to say, I didn’t read unless I had time. Truth: I opened them because I knew it’s easy track open rates and authors will remove you from the list if you don’t show up. (Do you sometimes do this, too? Tell me in the comments!)
Back to my nonexistent newsletter. When I finally forced myself to create a Mailchimp account, I vowed not to spam people with weekly shameless self promo. And I decided to send our a quarterly news letter. Hoping beyond a hope that I would have quarterly news to share! Well, my story is like so many other authors, a global pandemic put a halt to all goodly plans. When I finally began sending those news letters, I didn’t have much to share.
Then some time last year, an idea flitted into my head about a short helpful post. Something not too long, but also not full of flap. Something I could be excited and proud to write about. Something authentic, with content that connected all the creative things I balance every day. Drawing, gardening, piano … Music, Musings, and the Muse.
The trick was to begin to make it a habit.
Since I write each morning anyway, I decided that each Friday, I’d post a photo and write about whatever came to me that day. No Pressure. Pressure and stress are likely to kill my ability to begin something new faster that a gunshot to the heart. I suspect you’re the same. And ultimately, no pressure became a mantra.
I’m not going to stress about this.
I’m not going to stress about what I have to say.
I’m not going to stress about how many comments I get.
I’m not going to care about the open rate.
Just write.
“Build it and they will come.”
I love that quote from the movie Love of the Game with Kevin Costner.
And so I did.
The thing is, the more I do it, the more I find I do have something to say. I also find I enjoy the process. It’s kind of nice to look back and see twenty posts, and know that number is growing. There is power in repetition. In building a habit, you can build your confidence. 50 words becomes 1000 words becomes 30,000 words, and eventually a book.
Most importantly, by showing up for myself, I can also show up for you.
Thanks so much for being part of my habit.
Hi Tracey,
I love this post, and agree about the importance of habit.
A million or so years ago, I accepted time not as a thing in itself but merely as a way of organizing a sequence of events. For example, Social Time: "I will meet you after the movie." Clock Time: "I will meet you at 8:00 pm." Or Ordered Time: "I will meet you after the following two things I need to do." Once I accepted this, I realized that we can't save time, spend time, or waste time, and so on; we can only create an active life around our events and desires. And the best way to do that is through flexible habits.
Peace, love, music, and books,
Nick
Thank you for this post and for your newsletter. I am traveling so it is a habit foe, but I keep on trying!